The Lizard Chronicles

Some of this is true. Some of this is better. –Too Much Joy

Second Shower Today July 25, 2018

Filed under: Life tales,Poetry,Uncategorized,Writing — lizardesque @ 4:42 pm
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Jostled can opens

At least it’s only seltzer

Damp but not sticky


My Side Effects Have Side Effects January 25, 2018

Filed under: cancer,Poetry,Uncategorized — lizardesque @ 3:42 pm
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Prescription hand cream

Smells like dry-erase markers

Hand-foot syndrome blues


Julaiku 2, Day 22 July 22, 2016

Filed under: Uncategorized — lizardesque @ 5:23 pm

The first is my bestie.

July 22, 2016

The second best thing

About Peoria is

Hummus from One World 


Julaiku 2, Day 3 July 3, 2016

Filed under: Uncategorized — lizardesque @ 10:11 am

July 3, 2016

Run! The end is nigh!

Or so it sounds to cat ears

When fireworks go boom

*Bonus haiku for my dear husband’s birthday*

Happy birthday, Love!

May it be wholly without



Dissonant Unrest May 11, 2016

Filed under: Fiction,Life tales,Uncategorized — lizardesque @ 4:22 pm
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You know those “13.1” or “26.2” stickers that some people have on the backs of their cars to signify that they’ve completed a half or full marathon? Yeah, well, I’ve never come close to running a marathon, but today, I finished reading Infinite Jest, and I kind of want something like this for the back of my car in recognition of this accomplishment.


Footnotes and all!

I have to think it would be more satisfying than the prospect of wandering around in a daze for an indeterminate amount of time trying to figure out what the heck I just read. More on this later when the fog clears…maybe.

Come to think of it, I read Anna Karenina last year, so I believe I deserve one of these as well.


Better than getting hit by a train!


37 Cool Things I Did While I Was 37 October 24, 2012

Filed under: Food,Life tales,lists,photography,Travel,Uncategorized,Writing,Yoga — lizardesque @ 8:29 am

Happy birthday to me.

  1. Celebrated my birthday in Amsterdam
  2. Visited the Anne Frank House.
  3. Reread the Diary of Anne Frank
  4. Visited the M.C. Escher Museum
  5. Had a piece published in a daily calendar
  6. Attended a writing and yoga workshop
  7. Completed a goal of running 450 miles in a year
  8. Started and maintained whatsonlizshead
  9. Visited the Adler Planetarium
  10. Visited the Milwaukee Art Museum

    At the Milwaukee Art Museum

  11. Completed a goal of posting a picture a day on Facebook
  12. Made my own cheese

    Cheese making!

  13. Saw the “Radical Vulnerability” exhibit at the Veteran’s Art Museum
  14. Went on a kayaking and yoga excursion

    Kayaking after limbering up with yoga

  15. Made a hat
  16. Went sledding
  17. Saw the play, “Freud’s Last Session”
  18. Saw the transit of Venus

    The transit of Venus

  19. Grew my own peppers
  20. Went to the Hala Kahiki Lounge
  21. Saw the Roy Lichtenstein exhibit at the Art Institute
  22. Had my name recognized as a writer
  23. Got a pretty close-up look of a number of glaciers
  24. Hiked part of the Chiltook Trail
  25. Rode the White Pass Summit Train
  26. Went zip lining in Ketchikan, Alaska
  27. Visited the Space Needle at night
  28. Wrote to David Cameron to inquire about my being knighted
  29. Saw Blondie and Devo in concert

    Whip it good

  30. Read one of my publications in front of a live audience at the Harold Washington Library
  31. Drank champagne in France
  32. Climbed to the top of the Arc de Triomphe
  33. Visited the Eiffel Tower
  34. Climbed to the top of Notre Dame cathedral
  35. Visited Versailles
  36. Took a night-time boat tour on the Seine
  37. Bought French perfume in France

Chalkfest 2012: Scandal and a Three-Peat September 3, 2012

Filed under: Family,Life tales,Uncategorized — lizardesque @ 3:46 pm
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Every summer for the past several years, my parents have had an annual summer party that includes a chalk art competition. This year, it was September 2. Unfortunately, attendance was low due to illnesses, work schedules, and vacations. Or perhaps, people were just shaking in their shoes about going up against the defending champion (yours truly). In fact, there was a shameless attempt to buy a win this year by my Aunt Liz and Uncle Ralph, who placed a $20-bill, a credit card, and car keys in front of their drawing!

There were only five entries in the chalk art competition. For some reason, how the contest is judged/voted has not been consistent over the years. Sometimes everyone votes. Sometimes judges who are not a competition entrants are appointed. This year, three judges were appointed, but after reviewing the entries, they decided, in an unprecedented act of wussery, that everyone was a winner and there would be five lifetime achievements awards given.

WTF are we in pee-wee tee-ball? Oh, everyone’s a winner. Yadayadayada… BS.

The judges were overruled, and it was decided that, instead, everyone would vote, but when the votes were being tallied, the biggest scandal ever to rock the chalk party was uncovered! There were only 10 voters but 16 ballots, several of which were in the same handwriting and ranked Liz and Ralph’s entry as first. Their entry was immediately disqualified. I am that proposing a committee be organized to rule on whether they should be permanently barred from competition.

After the attempted bribery and voter fraud, the winners were announced, at long last. It was a three-peat win for me!

Attempted bribery and voter fraud! Disqualified entry!

My dad’s entry

Third place entry from my mom

Second place went to this lovely drawing of a lighthouse under a blue moon by Patty

Snoopy and Woodstock for the three-peat win!