The Lizard Chronicles

Some of this is true. Some of this is better. –Too Much Joy

Forty-three Notable Things I Did While I Was Forty-three October 24, 2018

Filed under: Life tales,lists,photography — lizardesque @ 5:09 am
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  1. Had fun in the photo booth at Gilt Bar
    Giltbar
  2. Visited the Catcade

    Catcade

    I’m a kitty!

  3. Took control of my hair loss by getting my hair cut and later shaving my head

    Shaved

    Perhaps the most badass I’ve ever looked

  4. Donated my hair to charity

    Hair_during

    I hope it made someone else happy!

  5. Colored my hair with a Sharpie

    SharpieHair

    Before it fell out–not like I was worried about damaging it!

  6. Finished knitting an afghan for my brother

    Afghan

    All cozy under the afghan with Yoda

  7. Went to Story Sessions at City Winery
  8. Added romance to chickpea burgers

    Chickpeaburgers

    I had chemo on Valentine’s Day, so we kept it low key

  9. Knitted a ridiculously long stocking cap
    Stockingcap
  10. Escaped another room

    Escape

    Victory!

  11. Attended a Seder for the first time (and found the afikoman, thus winning a major award!)
  12. Finished chemo—fucking hooray!
    Award

    Another major award!

    Fuckcancer

    I wore these for every chemo session

  13. Made funnel cakes at home

    Funnelcakes

    I hardly even burned myself!

  14. Had a lumpectomy (especially notable since I was originally was looking at a mastectomy before chemo shrank my tumor down to almost nothing!)
  15. Helped produce Monsters, Myths and Other Matters
  16. Got a Lyft with Snoopy

    LizIanSnoop

    I wonder how much Snoopy increases this Lyft driver’s tips

  17. Had fun with new hair colors
  18. Got a Kit-Kat clock
    Kit-Kat
  19. Kept up with my Spanish lessons (almost daily)
  20. Danced on the ceiling

    Ceiling

    Oh, what a feeling!

  21. Leaped into a pot of happiness

    PotofHappy

    The big leap

  22. Played in a confetti room

    Confetti

    Silly fun

  23. Hugged a giant rubber duck

    DuckLove

    You’re the one!

  24. Gave and received henna tattoos

    Henna

    We’re not quitting our day jobs to become henna tattoo artists, but it was fun.

  25. Completed Julaiku for a fourth year
  26. Educated people about feral shopping carts
  27. Saw Anthony Rizzo’s 1000th career hit (live and in person)
  28. Banged the gong after finishing radiation therapy

    Gong

    Get it on!

  29. Made use of the emergency crown that I keep in my wallet

    Crown

    You just never know when you might need one!

  30. Applied to be a Cards Against Humanity writer
  31. Was depicted in painting

    Painting

    Amazingly, a friend of mind did this in about 10 minutes!

  32. Visited House on the Rock as an adult for the first time
    InfinityRoom

    The Infinity Room

    Attack

    Eeeek!

    Bunny

    Who doesn’t want to sit on a giant hare?

  33. Visited the National Mustard Museum

    Mustard

    Yes, this is a thing.

  34. Got crafty with my husband
    Signs
  35. Knitted a shrug

    Shrug

    It’s cozy.

  36. Saw some cool stuff during Open House Chicago
    Library

    Charles Deering Library

    Libraryinside

    Charles Deering Library

    Winebook

    Book and wine return? (look closely)

    Observatory

    Dearborn Observatory

    Telescope1

    Dearborn Observatory

  37. Visited the American Toby Jug Museum
  38. Visited Few Distillery

    Few

    Distillery or giant clarinet?

  39. Took some pretty cool black and white photos

  40. Went on a major organization kick and finally made a dent in my clutter
  41. Sent a goat to a friend
  42. Got my old tattoo spruced up

    SunMoon

    Like new!

  43. Finally got the new tattoo I’ve been talking about for ages

    Interrobang

    My favorite punctuation mark

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The Mystery of Stevie Nicks Day August 12, 2018

It began in 2015 (at least as far as I know). The online calendar of the Luxembourg-American Cultural Society proclaimed that August 12 wast Stevie Nicks Day. Why? I had no idea. A quick google search revealed to me that Stevie Nicks was not a Luxembourger by heritage, nor was she born on August 12. Curious. An e-mail to the LACS asking about the Nicks-Luxembourg connection was met with no answer, and within a few days of said inquiry, Stevie Nicks Day mysteriously disappeared from the LACS calendar.

Was it a joke? Was some Stevie Nicks fan at the LACS messing around or running some sort of test? Oh, Starlee Kine, where are you and your Mystery Show when we need you?!

Regardless of its unclear origins, let us don fringe, or perhaps some leather and lace, to celebrate this joyous day! Stand back! I’m going to do some twirling!

aug12

Celebrating Stevie Nicks Day in 2015

 

Straight Talk About Feral Shopping Carts August 3, 2018

Filed under: Life tales,Oddities,photography — lizardesque @ 5:00 pm
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During the warmer months of the year, I spend quite a lot of time walking and riding my bike on the path in the forest preserve near my house. I’ve been frequenting this preserve for more than a decade now, and until quite recently, feral shopping carts were a pretty rare sight there. Sure, I saw a few over the years, but I certainly didn’t consider them a problem.

A little over a month ago, I spotted this cart. Having seen feral shopping carts in the past, I probably wouldn’t have thought much of it normally, but it’s bright orange color and the fact that it was flipped on it’s end made it stand out to me. My initial impulse was to help it by setting it on its wheels, but I know better than to get too close to a feral cart. They have been known to ram and scratch and are notorious for spreading disease.

SC1

It begins.

A week or so later, I spotted another cart, and then another just a few days later. Before I knew it, just over a month had passed, and I had seen seven feral shopping carts in that time. I can’t say for certain that each sighting involved a different cart, but there were at least four of them–I know this because of their distinct markings. I could no longer deny that feral shopping carts were becoming a problem in my neighborhood forest preserve.

SC3

A blue one!

SC5

This one is a little shy.

SC6

OMG, they’re everywhere!

In an effort to curb this growing problem and prevent similar issues in other areas, I feel compelled to offer the following tips on how to avoid contributing to the problem.

  • Do your part to keep carts from going stray. If you use shopping carts provided by retailers, return them to the proper places after you have finished your shopping. Proper places include depositories within stores (usually placed near the exits/entrances) and conveniently placed corrals in parking lots. Do not leave your carts free to roam in parking lots, as this increases the likelihood of their escape. Besides, only sociopaths abandon their carts uncorraled.
  • Do not set shopping carts “free.” You may think that by taking a cart out of a store or parking lot, you are opening it up to a glorious and free life, but that’s not the case. Most carts have spent their entire lives in captivity and have not developed the skills necessary to fend for themselves. Sadly, some carts have been altered by store owners who aim to slow shoppers down in efforts to increase the time (and thus money) they spend in stores. Such alterations further hinder carts’ survival in the wild.
SC4

The sad fate of one feral cart

  • Resist the impulse to acquire your own cart. Think carefully before bringing a shopping cart into your home. Sure, shopping carts are cute and fun, especially when they are young, but remember that they require care and commitment. The sad fact is that many shopping carts acquired on impulse end up being neglected. Often, these carts run away or are “set free” from their neglectful homes and must survive in the wild (see above for more on this) .
SC2

This poor cart was overturned and we unable to right itself on its own!

You may be wondering if there are trap-neuter-release (TNR) programs for shopping carts (as there are for feral cats in some communities). Unfortunately, at the present time, it’s not possible to spay or neuter shopping carts as they have no discernible genitalia. In fact, although shopping carts hav long been reproduced in laboratories, scientists remain mystified as to how they breed in the wild. Thus, the best defense against an out-of-control shopping cart population lies in not letting the carts get out in the first place.

We can solve this problem if we all do our part!

 

I Know It’ll Grow Back, But… July 28, 2018

Filed under: cancer,Life tales,Poetry,Writing — lizardesque @ 6:20 pm
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Of all that cancer’s

Stolen, I’m still most bitter

About my long hair

 

Formerly long and red, now short and blue(ish) July 27, 2018

Filed under: Life tales,Poetry,Writing — lizardesque @ 4:14 pm
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She eyes My I.D.

“Your hair is much different!”

Observant, this one

 

Second Shower Today July 25, 2018

Filed under: Life tales,Poetry,Uncategorized,Writing — lizardesque @ 4:42 pm
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Jostled can opens

At least it’s only seltzer

Damp but not sticky

 

Do as I Say, Not as I Do July 24, 2018

Filed under: Life tales,photography,Poetry,Writing — lizardesque @ 4:20 pm
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Version 2

Painted on the path:

“Always finish what you st”

Ironic wisdom