The Lizard Chronicles

Some of this is true. Some of this is better. –Too Much Joy

Northeast Road Trip Part 3: No Escape! (Also, Beer and Cupcakes) July 14, 2015

We rolled into Cambridge on Sunday afternoon. There was some short-lived navigational confusion owing to road construction and street closures, which was only compounded by an electronic street sign announcing road closures, not for construction, but rather for a dance party. At first, I thought the sign had been hacked, but there had indeed been a dance party. Alas, we’d missed it. Anyhow, we were able to recombobulate our bearings and find our way to the apartment of my brother (Chris) and his husband (David), where we hung out, chatted, and drank some of my favorite beer until it was time to check into our B&B. The inn was quite lovely, with the exception of the weird mosaic in the bathroom of our room. The old buttons, watch faces, and pieces of tea cups were charming enough, but every now and then there was a disembodied foot from a porcelain doll or a creepy old photo.

Can you find the missing extremity?

I’m afraid this child wants to eat my soul.

I will forgive this one piece of disturbing decor, especially since the inn had a beautiful winding staircase, and our room had a loft and a funky dresser. Also, there were delicious cupcakes.

I had to restrain myself from sliding down the banister.

Feeling lofty



The rest of our evening consisted of cocktails at Alden & Harlow, dinner at the West Side Lounge, and attempting to escape from a room. Perhaps that last one requires explanation. It’s an interactive game in which you are locked in a room with nine other people and have one hour to find clues, solve puzzles, and escape to freedom. I was a bit apprehensive knowing that, if we failed and were trapped there indefinitely, I was likely to be the first one eaten. Actually, the game makers are legally obligated to let you out of the room, even if you fail to solve the puzzle, which is good because we didn’t solve it. I must note, however, that in walking us through the puzzle solution after our time was up, our game maker discovered that one of the clues to the puzzle, a joker playing card, was missing. It had never been placed. Although it would have been possible to solve the puzzle without that clue, I’m going to go ahead and blame our failure on the missing card. We totally would have crushed it if we’d had that joker. Just try to prove me wrong!

Friggin' Joker

Friggin’ joker (Photo credit: Escape the Room Boston)

The next morning, Ian and I had the entire breakfast room to ourselves at the late (9:30) breakfast seating, as we were, apparently, the only guest of the inn who like to sleep in. Beer sounded like an excellent follow-up to breakfast, so we headed to the Sam Adams brewery for a tour and some beverage appreciation. Because Ian is a home brewer and I’ve taken brewery tours before, much of the information from the tour was not new to me. However, I did learn the following fun “facts” from our tour guide Zach.

  • Yeast is not only where bubbles come from but also where fun comes from
  • The Sam Adams “perfect pint” is the most stolen piece of glassware in the US
I like some whimsy with my beer.

I like some whimsy with my beer.

It's funny because one of my cats actually likes beer.

It’s funny because one of my cats actually likes beer.

That's totally Bob Cannon behind me, not just a cardboard cutout of him.

That’s totally Bob Cannon behind me, not just a cardboard cutout of him.

A tour of Fenway Park was next on our agenda. One of these days, we’ll actually get around to attending a game there–just like one of these days, we’ll get around to taking a tour of Wrigley Field and seeing parts of it that we normally don’t.

Hard to argue with that

Hard to argue with that.

At Fenway

At Fenway

I've heard of keeping your eye on the ball, but apparently, your butt works too.

I’ve heard of keeping your eye on the ball, but apparently, your butt works too.

The Green Monster

The Green Monster

Those are not *real* bleachers, but I do like the one red seat.

Those are not real bleachers, but I do like the one red seat.

From Fenway, we headed to the Top of the Hub to enjoy the view and some cocktails.

Boston from above

Boston from above

Then we met up with Chris and David again for drinks (yes, more drinks, we’re on vacation, dammit!) on the patio at our inn and dinner (and three shared desserts–again…vacation!) at The Foundry. There, our topics of discussion included

  • How much does Chris know about sports these days? (Apparently, a lot more than he used to! He’s come a long way from thinking that there were 21 outfielders in baseball. It’s not as much fun to quiz him anymore.)
  • What if Antonin Scalia were a baseball umpire? (Of course, he’d be wearing his robe)
  • How can David not like chocolate and peanuts together?? (It’s not as bad as hating penguins, but it’s still weird.)
  • My super awesome idea for a new twist on seemingly played-out vampire stories is sure to be the next big thing! (I’m hesitant to even mention it here for fear that someone will steal it and run with it, but knowing me, I’ll never get past my fantastic tagline. Vumpires: You’re Never Safe!)

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